Sunday.
If the universe were to ever deal me a good hand, now would be a great time. I could really use the money in a nice lottery win. I would pay off my student loan, put my parents in retirement, send my little brother to the best school with the best football team in the country, and use the rest to disappear.
Seriously the past 8 months have easily been the worst 8 months of my life so far. I went looking back into my old old old posts, and I used to be so optimistic. I was going to CHOOSE to be HAPPY every single day, and not let anyone get in the way of that. I wasn’t going to let any past relationships mess with my head. I was going to move on and be happy. I was going to have a great last year with my best friends and finish off university strong.
Well, welcome to the world, nothing turns out the way you planned.
I spent the last 8 months hating myself, and hating anyone who made me feel like I was worth nothing. I used to always want to stand out… since October all I’ve wanted was so disappear.
I could disappear and anyone who’s ever known me would forget I existed, and they would be relieved without knowing why, but it would be because they could stop pretending to be my friend without actually liking me.
Dear God,
I could really use a break. I’m tired of being shit on constantly. I need to do something to make me stop thinking about myself.
Anonymous asked: not sure what is going on in your life right now but remember it probably won't even matter in a year from now so chin up beautiful and smile( I know, easier said then done but please do try)
Thanks for taking the time to send this. It was really nice and thoughtful of you. <3
